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[littleheaven]

If you call me littleheaven70 then you know me from LJ
If you call me Little Heaven then you know me from ST
If you call me Claire then you are a friend
If you call me Claire Bear then you are a close friend
If you call me Claire Louise then you are my parents and I have done something naughty (although that doesn't happen at my age anymore!)
If you call me Mrs W then you are my sister's ex and I am going to run you over with my car
If you call me Cheap Slut Sex Poodle then you are my husband
If you call me Boobtastic then you're either still my husband, but you want something, or you're lying
If you call me baby or darling then you are my budgie Linus. He's a real charmer.